{"id":1535,"date":"2015-10-10T19:49:15","date_gmt":"2015-10-10T18:49:15","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.emmaheptonstall.com\/divorce-coaching\/?p=1535"},"modified":"2016-06-19T18:20:31","modified_gmt":"2016-06-19T17:20:31","slug":"i-stay-i-go","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.emmaheptonstall.com\/divorce-coaching\/i-stay-i-go\/","title":{"rendered":"Should I Stay or Should I Go?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>[et_pb_section admin_label=&#8221;section&#8221; transparent_background=&#8221;off&#8221; allow_player_pause=&#8221;off&#8221; inner_shadow=&#8221;off&#8221; parallax=&#8221;off&#8221; parallax_method=&#8221;off&#8221; padding_mobile=&#8221;off&#8221; make_fullwidth=&#8221;off&#8221; use_custom_width=&#8221;off&#8221; width_unit=&#8221;on&#8221; make_equal=&#8221;off&#8221; use_custom_gutter=&#8221;off&#8221; gutter_width=&#8221;3&#8243;][et_pb_row admin_label=&#8221;row&#8221;][et_pb_column type=&#8221;4_4&#8243;][et_pb_text admin_label=&#8221;Text&#8221; background_layout=&#8221;light&#8221; text_orientation=&#8221;left&#8221; use_border_color=&#8221;off&#8221; border_color=&#8221;#ffffff&#8221; border_style=&#8221;solid&#8221;]<\/p>\n<h1><span style=\"color: #877674;\">Should I stay or should I go?<\/span><\/h1>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-family: tahoma, arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;\">Should I stay or should I go? Divorce or not to divorce. Hmmm. Never an easy question. The truth is, only you can decide. But how do you make such a tough decision?<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-family: tahoma, arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;\">How can you be sure that you get it right?<\/span><\/p>\n<h2 style=\"text-align: center;\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"should_i_stay_or_should_i_go_the_free_webinar\"><\/span><span style=\"color: #877674;\">Should I Stay or Should I go the free webinar<\/span><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"line-height: 1.7em;\">[mailmunch-form id=&#8221;153059&#8243;]<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"line-height: 1.7em; font-family: tahoma, arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;\">You know that the fall out from it is going to be huge. Its going to be monumental. It&#8217;s going to change your life. If you&#8217;re a lady who is (thinking of) leaving, you want it to be for the better. After all, no one leaves a happy relationship that fulfils all their emotional needs. I&#8217;m sorry but that&#8217;s the truth.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2 style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"why_love_doesnt_conquer_all\"><\/span><span style=\"color: #c898a4;\">Why love doesn&#8217;t conquer all<\/span><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-family: tahoma, arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;\">If you&#8217;ve been thinking of leaving for a while, you&#8217;ll probably already know that love doesn&#8217;t conquer all. Oh, don&#8217;t get me wrong, it would be fabulous if it did. But it doesn&#8217;t.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-family: tahoma, arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;\">Love just ain&#8217;t enough.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-family: tahoma, arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;\">Relationships don&#8217;t end just because of a lack of love. You and your husband may love each other truly, madly and deeply. However, if any of these characteristics feature in your relationship, you may be struggling:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul style=\"text-align: justify;\">\n<li>Alcohol misuse<\/li>\n<li>Drug misuse<\/li>\n<li>Differing libido<\/li>\n<li>Financial issues<\/li>\n<li>Depression<\/li>\n<li>Working too much<\/li>\n<li>Unemployment<\/li>\n<li>Illness<\/li>\n<li>Your values have changed<\/li>\n<li>Domestic abuse<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-family: tahoma, arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;\">And of course there are many more. These issues can make it extremely hard to leave, particularly if you still love your husband. Even if you don&#8217;t, there&#8217;s that gut wrench guilt. Guilt that you&#8217;re abandoning him when he needs you. Guilt that you&#8217;ll be leaving the father of your kids and separating them when they adore each other.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-family: tahoma, arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;\">You might be telling yourself you&#8217;re a selfish moo. But is \u00a0that really the truth? Are you really a bad person for wanting to leave? Really?<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-family: tahoma, arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;\">I recently did some research where ladies shared that <strong>on average, they waited 5 years before leaving<\/strong>. Many were in double figures. Very few ladies leave on a whim. They dig in and they do what they can to make it work. But what if you&#8217;ve done all that and you can&#8217;t take anymore?<\/span><\/p>\n<blockquote>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><em><strong><span style=\"color: #877674;\">I&#8217;m not telling you to stay, what I am saying is &#8216;Wait&#8217;.<\/span><\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<h2 style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"should_i_just_go_then\"><\/span><span style=\"color: #c898a4;\">Should I just go then?<\/span><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-family: tahoma, arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;\">No! Not unless you are experiencing domestic abuse. If you are experiencing abuse within your relationship, there are plenty of organisations who can help you, including <em><strong><span style=\"color: #877674;\"><a style=\"color: #877674;\" href=\"http:\/\/www.womensaid.org.uk\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Women&#8217;s Aid<\/a>.\u00a0<\/span><\/strong><\/em><\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-family: tahoma, arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;\">This post is for you if you are <strong>not<\/strong> experiencing domestic violence.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-family: tahoma, arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;\">You may have been thinking of leaving for a while, and you may be thinking <span style=\"color: #c989c4;\">&#8216;<em>What. She&#8217;s now telling me to stay<\/em>?<\/span>&#8216; No. I&#8217;m not telling you to stay, what I am saying is &#8216;Wait&#8217;. You see, I&#8217;m betting that you haven&#8217;t been very organised in your thinking. Why would you? You&#8217;re in a really uncomfortable place right now and it feels awful.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"color: #877674; font-family: tahoma, arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;\">I&#8217;ll tell you a little story&#8230;.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-family: tahoma, arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;\">When I was in school I used to get so overwhelmed with all my homework. I was very conscientious and liked to make sure all my work was done on time and it was the best that it could be. I was a total stress-head. Perhaps you can relate to that feeling? My dad used to say this to me<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">&#8216;<span style=\"color: #877674;\"><strong><em>Emma. Just plan your work and work your plan<\/em><\/strong><\/span>&#8216;<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-family: tahoma, arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;\">And that&#8217;s what I used to do. OK, it often involved very intricate colour coded planners that took me hours \u00a0(I know I&#8217;m a procrastinator too), but the point is, I<span style=\"color: #c989c4;\"> <strong>knew what I need to do and when<\/strong><\/span>.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-family: tahoma, arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;\">When you got married I bet you planned the ass-off of it. Lists, notebooks, magazines, you name it, you had it. And why not?! You were super organised, you knew what you wanted and how to get it. Your divorce should be no different. Plan. Get clear. Get so clear there&#8217;s no room for doubt.<\/span><\/p>\n<h2 style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span class=\"ez-toc-section\" id=\"getting_clear_starts_with_a_smart_decision\"><\/span><span style=\"color: #c898a4;\">Getting clear starts with a smart decision<\/span><span class=\"ez-toc-section-end\"><\/span><\/h2>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-family: tahoma, arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;\">Put to one side for a moment the fact that you may have been waiting months or years to leave. What if you could get really clear, once and for all about whether you should leave. Would that make you feel better?<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-family: tahoma, arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;\">I know it would.<\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-family: tahoma, arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;\">And what if I was to tell you, that with just a few minutes &#8216;work&#8217; over a couple of days, you&#8217;ll be so much closer to that decision because it will literally be staring you in the face, would you be interested to know more? Well, I have news for you. I&#8217;ve put together a webinar to share with you my tips for helping you decide if it&#8217;s time to go. <strong>Sign up to watch now!<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: justify;\"><span style=\"font-family: tahoma, arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;\">This webinar is for you lovely. \u00a0If you&#8217;ve already been through the whole shebang and want to share your insights let me know too! I&#8217;ll be delighted to share your expertise too! Comment below or email me if you prefer. You can sign up here, its free to attend:<\/span><\/p>\n<p>[mailmunch-form id=&#8221;153059&#8243;]<\/p>\n<p>[\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][\/et_pb_section]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Should I stay or should I go? Should I stay or should I go? Divorce or not to divorce. Hmmm. Never an easy question. The truth is, only you can decide. But how do you make such a tough decision? How can you be sure that you get it right? 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