[et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ _builder_version=”3.22″][et_pb_row _builder_version=”3.25″ background_size=”initial” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”3.25″ custom_padding=”|||” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.9.0″ text_font_size=”16px” header_text_align=”justify” header_text_color=”#c5b2b1″ header_2_text_color=”#c984a4″ background_size=”initial” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat” text_orientation=”justified”]<\/p>\n
For many clients, money is a touchy subject. In the UK we are culturally trained not to talk about it! But divorce is not the time to be squeamish about money issues. It is time to take control of what you have, and what you need. And to have an eye on your soon-to-be-ex\u2019s financial activity too. Let\u2019s look at how to ensure you get the best financial settlement on divorce.<\/p>\n
If you\u2019ve followed me for a while you\u2019ll know this is one of my mantras! Don\u2019t agree to a single thing before knowing your numbers. And what do I mean by that?<\/p>\n
I mean know absolutely everything you have to pay out for. Think about your living expenses. Use bank statements to verify your assumptions. You\u2019ll be astonished at how much you\u2019d overlook otherwise. And make sure you take a year\u2019s expenditure into account. There will be annual expenses (such as insurance or the car MOT) that you\u2019d miss otherwise.<\/p>\n
Think about your debts. Both your own, and joint liabilities you hold with your spouse \u2013 such as a mortgage. If your name is on the mortgage you\u2019ll be liable for payments regardless of what your soon-to-be-ex does.<\/p>\n
Then move on to your assets. What do you own? This will include any equity you have in your home, savings, investments, belongings and pensions. You may need to do some detective work here \u2013 delve into bank accounts that you\u2019ve not looked at before. Understand what pensions you and your partner have. Seek valuations on your home, car, jewellery and other valuables.<\/p>\n
The court distinguishes between matrimonial and non-matrimonial assets. Matrimonial assets are those which you acquired together \u2013 either when you lived together pre-marriage, or during the course of the marriage. They are usually things like a family home, pensions and savings. Non-matrimonial assets are those acquired before marriage or after separation. They can still be shared between both partners, if there is a good reason (for example to ensure the needs of both parties are met).\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Keep records of all your findings, along with any documentation you can get together.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n As well as investigating your own financial picture, think about your soon-to-be-ex\u2019s. For some clients, their spouse\u2019s financial life is a complete mystery. There may be private bank accounts, assets or pensions that you know nothing about. You will have clues to some of it though \u2013 if your soon-to-be-ex is employed they are likely to have a pension. If their monthly income doesn\u2019t come into a joint account that you have access to, it must be going somewhere.<\/p>\n They should disclose everything when it comes to completing the Form E. But if you\u2019ve done your own research you will be able to question anything that seems odd or incomplete in their disclosure more easily.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n If you suspect that they are hiding assets and you are in a high net worth marriage it is worth contacting professional asset tracers. Asset tracers work legally to \u2018follow the money\u2019. They can also provide professional advice on tactics to ensure the fairest financial settlement for you. Rather than having a \u2018gotcha\u2019 moment in court (however satisfying!) it can be more productive to have a mediated, non-combative approach.<\/p>\n Your research into recent living expenses will give you an insight into how much your lifestyle currently costs. Every divorce decision will vary, but it is reasonable to expect to maintain a similar standard of living after divorce \u2013 if means allow. The \u2018standard of living enjoyed by the family before the breakdown of the marriage\u2019 is a factor the courts would consider when ruling on your case.\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n Of course, both you and your soon-to-be-ex need to have your needs met. And it is often the case that there is less money to go around when you separate. It\u2019s common sense that two households are more expensive than one. So it\u2019s not guaranteed that life will proceed exactly as before. But you certainly have the right to fight for a similar standard of living if there are means to allow it.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n It\u2019s also worth thinking about the future \u2013 particularly when it comes to your children\u2019s future. If there are predictable expenses relating to the children, make sure you take these into account with any financial settlement.\u00a0 <\/span>For example. will life be more expensive with older children? Are there education expenses to consider?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n It is common for my clients to minimise their financial needs. They work out the absolute bare necessities to scrape by, for themselves and for their children and think that\u2019s enough. This can be because of feeling guilt, or because they just don\u2019t want to rock the boat.<\/p>\n If you recognise yourself as you read this please remember: you (and your children) do not deserve or need to live in poverty just because you are getting divorced. The court recognises this too. As we saw earlier \u2013 your standard of living during marriage is taken into account. Wherever possible the court will want both parties to come out of divorce with a similar standard of living to during marriage.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n So be your own best friend when you\u2019re thinking about your needs. It will make your life a lot easier in the long run.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n If it is down to the court to make a decision on your financial settlement a 50\/50 split is their starting point. Then they will take into account the Section 25 factors we discussed in \u2018How Does The Court Consider Fairness When You Divorce<\/em>?\u2019.<\/p>\n Imagine your divorce as a tug of war. The weight starts in the centre \u2013 that\u2019s a 50\/50 spilt. Then the judge will consider the factors relating to your case. Things like the welfare of the children, the needs both you and your soon-to-be-ex have. And things like your ability to bring in income, now and in the future. Those factors will push or pull the balance of the financial settlement. The parent with majority care for young children is likely to have less earning capacity, for example, and this will impact on the court\u2019s decision.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Every single case will be different, so it\u2019s hard to pinpoint exactly what the outcome will be. But it\u2019s safe to say a 50\/50 split is not inevitable. Because in many cases, the court would not see that as the fairest outcome.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Regulars to the blog know I\u2019m famous for telling clients to be the CEO of their divorce!<\/span><\/a> Why be the CEO? Because, ultimately, whether you accept the title or not, that\u2019s what you are. Of both your life and your divorce. You are in charge.<\/p>\n Does it mean you have to have all the answers yourself? No. The CEO of a company isn\u2019t the expert in every part of the business.<\/p>\n Does it mean you need to know what you want and have a plan to get there? Yes. As leader of your life and your divorce, it\u2019s crucial you know what you want and why. Then you can get the pieces in place to work towards it.<\/p>\n Does it mean you need to burn yourself out? No. Gone are the macho days of business leaders being proud of working themselves into the ground. They now recognise the smart choice is balance: they need to maintain their health and wellbeing. And to get in the support they need when they need it \u2013 whether that\u2019s on the finances, the legalities, or the decision-making.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n As a former solicitor and mediator, as well as being a coach, I can help you with every facet of your divorce. I can help you get clear on what you really want and need. And I can help you navigate the paperwork and legal process too. So if you\u2019re worried that you\u2019re not going to get a fair deal \u2013 let\u2019s talk it through together. Book in a call here<\/span><\/a>.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n Emma Heptonstall,<\/strong><\/a>\u00a0the Divorce Alchemist is the author of the Amazon best selling book\u00a0How to be a Lady Who Leaves, the Ultimate Guide to Getting Divorce Ready<\/strong><\/a>. A former lawyer, Emma is a family mediator and founder of Get Divorce Ready the online self-study and group programmes. Emma has been featured on BBC Radio, The Telegraph, the iPaper and in Marie Claire Magazine. To find out more visit\u00a0www.emmaheptonstall.com<\/strong><\/a><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][\/et_pb_section]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" How To Ensure You Get The Best Financial Settlement on Divorce For many clients, money is a touchy subject. In the UK we are culturally trained not to talk about it! But divorce is not the time to be squeamish about money issues. It is time to take control of what you have, and what […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":16166,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"on","_et_pb_old_content":" For many clients, money is a touchy subject. In the UK we are culturally trained not to talk about it! But divorce is not the time to be squeamish about money issues. It is time to take control of what you have, and what you need. And to have an eye on your soon-to-be-ex\u2019s financial activity too. Let\u2019s look at how to ensure you get the best financial settlement on divorce.<\/p> If you\u2019ve followed me for a while you\u2019ll know this is one of my mantras! Don\u2019t agree to a single thing before knowing your numbers. And what do I mean by that?<\/p> I mean know absolutely everything you have to pay out for. Think about your living expenses. Use bank statements to verify your assumptions. You\u2019ll be astonished at how much you\u2019d overlook otherwise. And make sure you take a year\u2019s expenditure into account. There will be annual expenses (such as insurance or the car MOT) that you\u2019d miss otherwise.<\/p> Think about your debts. Both your own, and joint liabilities you hold with your spouse \u2013 such as a mortgage. If your name is on the mortgage you\u2019ll be liable for payments regardless of what your soon-to-be-ex does.<\/p> Then move on to your assets. What do you own? This will include any equity you have in your home, savings, investments, belongings and pensions. You may need to do some detective work here \u2013 delve into bank accounts that you\u2019ve not looked at before. Understand what pensions you and your partner have. Seek valuations on your home, car, jewellery and other valuables.<\/p> The court distinguishes between matrimonial and non-matrimonial assets. Matrimonial assets are those which you acquired together \u2013 either when you lived together pre-marriage, or during the course of the marriage. They are usually things like a family home, pensions and savings. Non-matrimonial assets are those acquired before marriage or after separation. They can still be shared between both partners, if there is a good reason (for example to ensure the needs of both parties are met).\u00a0<\/span><\/p> Keep records of all your findings, along with any documentation you can get together.\u00a0<\/span><\/p> As well as investigating your own financial picture, think about your soon-to-be-ex\u2019s. For some clients, their spouse\u2019s financial life is a complete mystery. There may be private bank accounts, assets or pensions that you know nothing about. You will have clues to some of it though \u2013 if your soon-to-be-ex is employed they are likely to have a pension. If their monthly income doesn\u2019t come into a joint account that you have access to, it must be going somewhere.<\/p> They should disclose everything when it comes to completing the Form E. But if you\u2019ve done your own research you will be able to question anything that seems odd or incomplete in their disclosure more easily.\u00a0<\/span><\/p> If you suspect that they are hiding assets and you are in a high net worth marriage it is worth contacting professional asset tracers. Asset tracers work legally to \u2018follow the money\u2019. They can also provide professional advice on tactics to ensure the fairest financial settlement for you. Rather than having a \u2018gotcha\u2019 moment in court (however satisfying!) it can be more productive to have a mediated, non-combative approach.<\/p> Your research into recent living expenses will give you an insight into how much your lifestyle currently costs. Every divorce decision will vary, but it is reasonable to expect to maintain a similar standard of living after divorce \u2013 if means allow. The \u2018standard of living enjoyed by the family before the breakdown of the marriage\u2019 is a factor the courts would consider when ruling on your case.\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/p> Of course, both you and your soon-to-be-ex need to have your needs met. And it is often the case that there is less money to go around when you separate. It\u2019s common sense that two households are more expensive than one. So it\u2019s not guaranteed that life will proceed exactly as before. But you certainly have the right to fight for a similar standard of living if there are means to allow it.\u00a0<\/span><\/p> It\u2019s also worth thinking about the future \u2013 particularly when it comes to your children\u2019s future. If there are predictable expenses relating to the children, make sure you take these into account with any financial settlement.\u00a0 <\/span>For example. will life be more expensive with older children? Are there education expenses to consider?\u00a0<\/span><\/p> It is common for my clients to minimise their financial needs. They work out the absolute bare necessities to scrape by, for themselves and for their children and think that\u2019s enough. This can be because of feeling guilt, or because they just don\u2019t want to rock the boat.<\/p> If you recognise yourself as you read this please remember: you (and your children) do not deserve or need to live in poverty just because you are getting divorced. The court recognises this too. As we saw earlier \u2013 your standard of living during marriage is taken into account. Wherever possible the court will want both parties to come out of divorce with a similar standard of living to during marriage.\u00a0<\/span><\/p> So be your own best friend when you\u2019re thinking about your needs. It will make your life a lot easier in the long run.\u00a0<\/span><\/p> If it is down to the court to make a decision on your financial settlement a 50\/50 split is their starting point. Then they will take into account the Section 25 factors we discussed in \u2018How Does The Court Consider Fairness When You Divorce<\/em>?\u2019.<\/p> Imagine your divorce as a tug of war. The weight starts in the centre \u2013 that\u2019s a 50\/50 spilt. Then the judge will consider the factors relating to your case. Things like the welfare of the children, the needs both you and your soon-to-be-ex have. And things like your ability to bring in income, now and in the future. Those factors will push or pull the balance of the financial settlement. The parent with majority care for young children is likely to have less earning capacity, for example, and this will impact on the court\u2019s decision.\u00a0<\/span><\/p> Every single case will be different, so it\u2019s hard to pinpoint exactly what the outcome will be. But it\u2019s safe to say a 50\/50 split is not inevitable. Because in many cases, the court would not see that as the fairest outcome.\u00a0<\/span><\/p> Regulars to the blog know I\u2019m famous for telling clients to be the CEO of their divorce!<\/span><\/a> Why be the CEO? Because, ultimately, whether you accept the title or not, that\u2019s what you are. Of both your life and your divorce. You are in charge.<\/p> Does it mean you have to have all the answers yourself? No. The CEO of a company isn\u2019t the expert in every part of the business.<\/p> Does it mean you need to know what you want and have a plan to get there? Yes. As leader of your life and your divorce, it\u2019s crucial you know what you want and why. Then you can get the pieces in place to work towards it.<\/p> Does it mean you need to burn yourself out? No. Gone are the macho days of business leaders being proud of working themselves into the ground. They now recognise the smart choice is balance: they need to maintain their health and wellbeing. And to get in the support they need when they need it \u2013 whether that\u2019s on the finances, the legalities, or the decision-making.\u00a0<\/span><\/p> As a former solicitor and mediator, as well as being a coach, I can help you with every facet of your divorce. I can help you get clear on what you really want and need. And I can help you navigate the paperwork and legal process too. So if you\u2019re worried that you\u2019re not going to get a fair deal \u2013 let\u2019s talk it through together. Book in a call here<\/span><\/a>.\u00a0<\/span><\/p> Emma Heptonstall,<\/strong><\/a>\u00a0the Divorce Alchemist is the author of the Amazon best selling book\u00a0How to be a Lady Who Leaves, the Ultimate Guide to Getting Divorce Ready<\/strong><\/a>. A former lawyer, Emma is a family mediator and founder of Get Divorce Ready the online self-study and group programmes. Emma has been featured on BBC Radio, The Telegraph, the iPaper and in Marie Claire Magazine. To find out more visit\u00a0www.emmaheptonstall.com<\/strong><\/a><\/p>","_et_gb_content_width":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[59,1,13],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-16165","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-divorce-finances","category-i-want-to-leave-my-husband","category-the-divorce-process"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.emmaheptonstall.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/03\/Copy-of-EH_BlogImage-33.png?fit=1000%2C516&ssl=1","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p6aDhr-4cJ","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.emmaheptonstall.com\/divorce-coaching\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16165","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.emmaheptonstall.com\/divorce-coaching\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.emmaheptonstall.com\/divorce-coaching\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.emmaheptonstall.com\/divorce-coaching\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.emmaheptonstall.com\/divorce-coaching\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=16165"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.emmaheptonstall.com\/divorce-coaching\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/16165\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.emmaheptonstall.com\/divorce-coaching\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/16166"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.emmaheptonstall.com\/divorce-coaching\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=16165"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.emmaheptonstall.com\/divorce-coaching\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=16165"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.emmaheptonstall.com\/divorce-coaching\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=16165"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}<\/span>Think about your soon-to-be-ex\u2019s assets<\/span><\/h2>\n
<\/span>Think about your needs \u2013 now and in the future<\/span><\/h2>\n
<\/span>Are you making this mistake?\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/h2>\n
<\/span>Is a 50\/50 split inevitable?\u00a0<\/span><\/span><\/h2>\n
<\/span>Be the CEO of your divorce<\/span><\/h2>\n
<\/span>Work with me<\/span><\/h2>\n
<\/span>About Emma<\/span><\/h2>\n
How To Ensure You Get The Best Financial Settlement on Divorce<\/h1>
Know your numbers<\/h2>
A note about assets<\/h2>
Think about your soon-to-be-ex\u2019s assets<\/h2>
Think about your needs \u2013 now and in the future<\/h2>
Are you making this mistake?\u00a0<\/span><\/h2>
Is a 50\/50 split inevitable?\u00a0<\/span><\/h2>
Be the CEO of your divorce<\/h2>
Work with me<\/h2>
About Emma<\/h2>