{"id":4341,"date":"2019-01-07T03:30:03","date_gmt":"2019-01-07T03:30:03","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.emmaheptonstall.com\/divorce-coaching\/?p=4341"},"modified":"2025-12-23T09:54:26","modified_gmt":"2025-12-23T09:54:26","slug":"what-does-divorce-monday-mean-for-you","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.emmaheptonstall.com\/divorce-coaching\/what-does-divorce-monday-mean-for-you\/","title":{"rendered":"What does Divorce Monday mean for you?"},"content":{"rendered":"

[et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ _builder_version=”4.16″ global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_row _builder_version=”4.16″ background_size=”initial” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat” global_colors_info=”{}”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.16″ custom_padding=”|||” global_colors_info=”{}” custom_padding__hover=”|||”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.27.5″ text_font_size=”16px” header_text_align=”justify” header_text_color=”#c5b2b1″ header_2_text_align=”justify” header_2_text_color=”#c984a4″ text_orientation=”justified” hover_enabled=”0″ global_colors_info=”{}” sticky_enabled=”0″]<\/p>\n

What does Divorce Monday mean for you?<\/h1>\n

 <\/p>\n

This post was first published in 2019 and updated December 2025.<\/p>\n

Is Divorce Monday a real phenomenon or a media invention? As with most things, the truth is a bit of both.<\/span><\/p>\n

#DivorceMonday is traditionally the first working Monday of the year. Why? The story goes like this: unhappy couples limp or rage their way through Christmas, and get on the phone to their lawyers as soon as the offices are back open to call time on their marriage. Is this true? Sort of. Law firms do report higher than average contact from new divorce clients in January – not all on the first Monday of the year though!<\/span><\/p>\n

The decision to divorce doesn\u2019t just happen after a single bad Christmas though \u2013 it\u2019s far more complex than that.\u00a0 And if divorce is on the cards for you this year, your first action certainly shouldn\u2019t be to contact your lawyer (with two exceptions – more on those later).\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

So what should you be doing this month? Forget the media hype. You decide for yourself whether this is Day One or One Day for your divorce. If you\u2019re not sure, try these questions to help you get more clarity:<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/span>Did you grin and bear it over Christmas?<\/span><\/span><\/h2>\n

Christmas can be fraught, with pressure to create perfect Insta-ready moments, have fun parties with friends and snuggles by the fire watching festive TV. For some people that\u2019s just not the reality. Instead, tempers are raised, all that time together makes for arguments rather than magic moments.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Maybe you went into the holiday season resenting every second. You don\u2019t want to host the in-laws, or create magic for everyone else. You don\u2019t feel like your spouse has got your back, and you wish you could have done it on your own terms. And there\u2019s no way you could have this conversation with them.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

If your Christmas was more sniping than smooching, that could be <\/span>a sign your marriage is no longer a happy one<\/span><\/a>.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/span>Has your marriage been under strain for a while?<\/span><\/span><\/h2>\n

Let\u2019s not forget that Christmas can be stressful for everyone. A week of arguments at one of the most pressurised times of the year isn\u2019t enough to write off your marriage for good.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Think about how you\u2019ve been feeling over the past few months, before the Christmas mayhem. What was October like? How did you feel about your marriage then? If you\u2019ve been dreaming about divorce during less stressful times, it\u2019s time to take your thoughts seriously.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/span>Have you been dreaming of a different life?<\/span><\/span><\/h2>\n

A strong sign you need to take action is if you\u2019ve been thinking about what life could be like. How things could be different if you weren\u2019t married, or if your marriage was healthier. This is your wise inner-self telling you that life needs to change.<\/span><\/p>\n

New Year is a great opportunity to take stock. If you know you want your life to be different this year, think about what that really means. Different doesn\u2019t have to mean divorce, but you have to consider what it could mean.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

What changes can you put into practice for yourself? We can’t control what other people do, but we are responsible for our own actions. Have you got into a pattern with your spouse that sets you up for tension and conflict? Are there behaviours you can change in yourself? Talking things through with your spouse, perhaps with the help of a mediator, can help you reach a calm decision about whether divorce is the right way to go.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/span>Are you ready to take action?<\/span><\/span><\/h2>\n

Answered yes to every question so far? This is the big one, then. Are you ready to take action? If so, now what?<\/span><\/p>\n

Please don\u2019t contact a solicitor. There is no urgency to do this unless:<\/span><\/p>\n

    \n
  1. You are in a highly complex, high wealth situation and think you will need to protect assets urgently<\/span><\/li>\n
  2. You are experiencing domestic violence and may need legal protection. Agencies such as Women\u2019s Aid or Refuge can provide free information and support on this.<\/span><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    If those circumstances don\u2019t apply to you, your first port of call should be to strategise. And your solicitor is not the best person to strategise with? Why not? Their job is to navigate the legal system on your behalf. Yes, they can bring their expertise and experience to what is usually done in cases like yours. But they are not there to guide you through the emotional rollercoaster of deciding what you want and need from your future, and processing the hurt that has been caused by your marriage. You don\u2019t need a solicitor to tell you:<\/span><\/p>\n